How the Peanut Changed My Life

Just so you know, I love peanuts and I love peanut butter. I recently had a hankering for some peanut butter fudge and since I hadn't ever made any, I called my all-knowing and wise mother of many years to ask for any recipes or ideas that she had on how to make it. What she conveyed to me seemed to remind me of the time on that movie when Moses was standing there in amazement watching the commands being burned into the stones. Remember however that those commands are much more powerful than peanut butter and any fudge associated with it. So I made it and I call it PBF. Since it has been made, I find myself returning again and again to the fridge to get another piece. I am feeling the effects of eating too much of it, but since the flavor is so magnificent it seems like the only stopping point will be at the bottom of the container when all PBF has been eaten. So I warn you, if you are on a diet or don't want your tummy to hurt, you should either not make it or you should construct a plan that would limit your PBF intake. Great is the Lord for His creation of the wonderful peanut and miscellaneous items that would be mixed with it to create PBF. My current 'batch' is about half eaten now and when it is gone I will probably wait at least a month before I make more. So here is how you do it:

If you decide to make this, and you get hurt, burned, or fat,
I take no responsibility for your injuries or girth.
You have been warned.

Ingredients:

1 can of sweetened condensed milk 14oz.
3/4 cup of creamy peanut butter
12 oz. white chocolate baking squares
1 tsp vanilla
pinch of salt

Preparation:
Obtain a microwave safe mixing bowl large enough to hold all of the ingredients.
Throw all of the ingredients into the bowl.
Depending on your microwave - warm the mixture until the squares begin to melt, then stir the ingredients together with a spoon, spatch, or anything you choose.
--You will see the ingredients beginning to mix together.
Put the bowl with ingredients back into the micro and warm again until you see the ingredients begin boiling around the edge of the bowl. Once that occurs, pull the bowl with ingredients back out and stir again with your weapon of choice.
Back in the micro until you see it begin boiling again. Stop the micro, pull out the bowl and mixture. Stir it until it feels smooth, then pour onto a wax paper lined baking dish, or cookie sheet. Put that in the fridge and wait until it gets hard. Cut it with a knife into squares and store in a fridge safe container inside the fridge.

Consumption:

Reach into the container inside the fridge and procure a piece between your index finger and thumb. Place that PBF piece into your mouth and as it is lain on your tongue, remember to continue to breathe and after a moment begin to chew. I guarantee that you will enjoy it and if you don't, you might want to see a doctor for that. As you enjoy that first piece of heaven, you might not want to move too far from the fridge because, like I said, self-control is easily overcome by those PBF squares.

May the force be with you.